Wednesday, May 18, 2011

PARENTS // control the chaos of life

One thing I know about families today is that we are busy. If you have kids then your life is so much more busy than the pre-kid days. We now have 2 girls and our pace of life just keeps getting more hectic. One of the best books I have ever read as a parent is The 3 Big Questions for a Frantic Family by Patrick Lencioni because it helped give my wife and I a plan to control the chaos of life and give our family direction. Patrick explains that there are connections between successful organizations and successful families. Any successful organization needs leadership, clear goals, and a strategy. Your family needs the same thing. So many times we allow everyone else to give our family leadership, goals, and a strategy. Other families embrace the chaos and accept it as the norm. Healthy families choose to control the chaos by setting boundaries, goals, and by saying no often.

Set Boundaries >> seriously we all need boundaries and our families needs them too. Set boundaries that help you decide how many of the nights of the week will your family be out, how many sports or activities will the kids be in each year, how many meals will your family eat together each week, and how much will you plug into your church. As parents your kids need you to set the boundaries that will help your family thrive.

Set Goals >> decide what is most important for this season of your families life. Your family goals will shift from season to season but they will help define what is most important. For my family our goal right now is to help my wife get through grad school. All of us are making sacrifices to make it happen. When it is done we will have a new goal. Goals give the family a cause to rally around.

Say No Often >> when a family has set boundaries and set goals the family is able to say no to good things in order to focus on what is best. Controlling the chaos of life means parents have to learn to say no. Sure you and your kids will not be everywhere or do everything but what you may find is a healthy family in the other side of no.

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